You heard it here first…

The recession is over. That’s right, it’s officially over. Oh sure, you can wait for the Wall Street Journal to call it, but the old media is far too slow. I’m calling the event here, based on a single economic indicator.

I work with a great, albeit shrinking, group of people. Every once in a while the group likes to live high on the hog, and go down to Sam’s club to buy a polish dog combo. Hot dog and soda, $1.62. Can’t beat that deal.

I’ve been trying to lost a bit of weight over the last few months (I’m down 7 pounds and counting), so I usually pass on the meal, but I like to ride with these guys because the conversation is always so stimulating. While they are buying their combos (and after I’ve drunk my strawberry slim fast), I walk around the aisles, performing my ‘hunter gatherer’ routine. I hit every sample station in the place because…well, I have no pride.

That being said, I’ve noticed that the bounteous harvest has been anything less than bounteous, as of late. In fact, at the height of the stock market crash, I went there one day and there were only three sample stations set up. I had to drink a lot of water that day, and eat some grass.

However, today, that has all turned around. Sam’s Club must be on the way up, because this was my hunter gatherer experience today. Behold, the fruit of my labors:

Hot cider
Chicken salad on a club cracker
Meatball dipped in alfredo
Part of a fiber one bar
Black forest ham
Chicken in BBQ sause
Ghirardelli chocolate
Diet juice
Part of a cinnamon roll

Now, you may wonder how I hope to lose weight with all that food, but remember, this comes in servings about the size of a quarter.

If Sam’s Club can afford to put out a spread like this, then you can rest assured, the hard times are almost over.