The Open Author

The posting has begun. There are now two chapters of Chickens in the Headlights up over at my other site, http://chickenarmpits.com. I’m posting one a week, so drop by and listen in. For those who haven’t read my book, I think you’ll like it. For those that have read the book, you really should listen to the audio book, David Walker does a fantastic job narrating the book.

Anyway, if you feel so inclined, head on over and listen in.

I’ve decided I have too much crap. Way too much crap. The idea occurred to me on my last trip to Bear Lake. We were having a family reunion, and since the water has fallen it’s a bit of a walk from the place we were staying, to the beach.

But still, it’s just a trip to the beach, you don’t need that much stuff, right?

Wrong.

All of my cousins and uncles and aunts had to fill cars of stuff, just to get down to the beach. We couldn’t carry it because of all our stuff. We had to take chairs, and food, and water, and sun screen, and toys for the kids, and an awning for shade, and towels, books, plates for the food, cups for the water, and on and on and on. It blew my mind. I got to thinking about it and I realized all I really needed was a towel (Douglas Adams was right), and a book. And even the book was optional.

We carried all this stuff down and all it did was get in the way. I noticed the kids didn’t really play with all the sand toys we brought. Sure, every once in a while they would, but for the most part they were just playing in the water. I think we spent more time as adults chasing down toys that were blowing or floating away than the kids ever spent on the toy.

The food got sandy, the awning blew over, the water was warm, the cups got scattered…It was silly.

You know, when we got rid of our second car, it was really hard for about 10 days. I kept being put out that I couldn’t just up and go somewhere, even if Sue had the car. And now I don’t give it a second thought. I bike more, I walk more, I take the bus. We just don’t need it. We’re saving money, the environment, and I’m more healthy. I think the concept of less is more is true in many different areas.

I’ve decided that there is a high cost when you buy something, no matter what the price is. I want to simplify, but first I need to convince the family it’s in our best interest to do so.

I guess I’ll start with my stuff. I have held on to a lot of things that I just don’t need. The DI is about to get a whole pile of stuff. If you’re willing to pay the price, feel free to wander on over and pick some of it up.

A great, great story out of Provo, Utah. To summarize, girl delivers pizza to senate majority leader, Curt Bramble. Bramble turns out to be a weenie. Girl blogs about it. The rest…is history.

KSL Nightside picks it up. Then KSL.com. Then the Tribune (who wins hands down the best picture of the whole event). Then it goes national with Fark, the Daily Kos, and even wikipedia (scroll down to the PizzaGate section).

Is there any question in anybody’s mind that the internet is a good thing? That is gives a voice to the people who have long been without one? This isn’t about bringing down a politician. It’s about calling out bad behavior when you see it.

In the past we’ve been able to do things like write a letter to the editor, but that form of communication is beholden to the big media outlets. We can only share our thoughts if they deem them worth. Blogging gives a voice to people in a way that has never before been available.

What a great, great story, and I hope that it has a David and Goliath ending. I hope in the end, Mr. Bramble gets to return to his CPA career, where he can happily tell people that checks are as good as cash. There are a lot of good men and women in our state, surely we can find better.

There is a saying that goes something like, “Tis better to aim for the stars and miss, than aim for a manure pile and hit.”

I disagree.

In all my 35 years, I’ve never liked running. In fact, I’ve hated it. Why do I hate it? Because I’m no good! Here is a secret. If you’re sitting on the couch, and you decide that you want to get up and run a few miles, it’s not going to happen. You’ll crap out by the end of the first block.

When I can’t even run around the block I feel like a loser. So why would I want to get off the couch and run when the end result is that I feel like a loser? I’d much rather sit on the couch and feel like a winner (nobody is as good at sitting on the couch as I am). When I aim for the stars and miss, my self esteem is shot.

But for the past three weeks I’ve been doing the C25k program. Don’t worry, this isn’t going to turn into a jog blog. But the nice thing about this program is that it starts ridiculously easy. For example, the first week I was never running for more than 60 seconds. That is cake! The next week I ran for 90 seconds, and this week, 3 minutes. I’ve always been a bit winded, but never in pain. And since I’m aiming for the manure pile, and not the stars, by golly I feel good about myself. I am hitting my goal every time. Nobody, and I mean nobody, can hit that manure pile like I can. *pats back with a manure covered hand*.

So, don’t buy into the stary eyed hype. Did you know that space (where stars live) is a cold and barren place? The Manure pile is nice and warm. Because the manure is fresh.

Come my friends. Come join me in the manure pile.

Image courtesy of Baby Dinosaur.

Don’t know that I’ve ever heard this story, but it rings true.

I think there will always be a mix of natural talent and work, but talent will never make up for a good work ethic.

If you had asked me last night what I thought of running, I would have spat. Then I would have shaken my fist in the air, and then just for good measure, I would have spat a second time. And if I had gotten spittle on you I wouldn’t have apologized, because, after all, you were the one to bring up the topic.

However, my wife has been running for a few months now. In fact, she just ran a 5k out to the American West Heritage Center (who is that family on their site?!). It was fun to watch her, and she has said she has been having fun in the morning. She sent me this site which basically tells you how to go from the couch (what a lovely place to be), to running a 5 k in just 9 weeks.

I was unconvinced, but thought I’d give it a go. I downloaded a podcast that tells you when you should be running and walking, I woke up this morning at 6:45, and we headed out.

And it was cake.

I mean, come on. First you walk 5 minutes. Then you run for 60 seconds. I run that long trying to chase down one of my kids to give him his what have for. Then you walk for 90 seconds, and repeat. You only do this for a total of 20 minutes.

My legs are a bit sore, but you only do this 3 times a week. I actually enjoyed it. I’m going to give it a shot again on Friday, and then try the next week on the schedule.

Who knows, maybe I’ll try a 5k before this is all over. But if not…I’m also fine with going back to the couch. The couch is such a nice place to be. You can sit on it. You can sleep on it. You can even eat on it, if nobody is watching.

The setting for this quote is important. We were sitting in church, and it was the quietest part of church. Nobody is talking. Everybody is lost in their thoughts. They are thinking about the meaning of life, their relationship with a higher power. Complete silences hangs over the meeting house like heavy drapes. Then my son shatters this peaceful moment for everybody…

Jared: “Hey Isaac! Pull my finger!”

Scout 1: “Did anybody bring face cards?”
Scout 2: “Keegan did, but they’re all nines.”

The final chapter of The Super Trio is up. You can now listen to the entire book at http://thesupertrio.com

I’ve had a lot of fun doing this, even though my reading skills leave a lot to be desired. If you know of a little person, between the ages of 5 and 12, please send them my way. The book is free. There are no ads. It’s just a whole lot of fun.

Scout: “You don’t look like an American.”
Camp Staff: “But I am an American.”
Scout: “You look like you could be a French Canadian with a tan.